damik's Diaryland Diary

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Dream (The Real Ones)

I had a dream last night...

I had started school again. My friend Jenny and I were the only ones sitting in the classroom, the bright room vaguely resembled my eight-grade world studies room. Though I was supposed to be in collage the school had a high school air to it. The teacher had let me re-take a test I had missed because I enrolled in school two weeks after it started. I was told it was some kind of standardized test, or placement test, or something to that effect. But, I recognized it as an IQ test I had taken online a few weeks earlier. My friend Jenny, who had already taken the test, was trying to give me hints without giving away actual answers. My teacher, who reminded me of the judge in "Save the Last Dance", was hovering about criticizing me and telling me I was going to be expelled. I was getting real frustrated and discouraged because I couldn't understand Jenny's hints and I couldn't concentrate with the teacher's remarks. The test was also quite big, a sizable stack of papers. I hadn't even gotten through the first few pages when the teacher announced that time was up and tried to take away my test. I put my hand on the unfinished portion of the test and said I needed more time. We argued (this part has gotten fuzzy with the day) and soon enough I started crying and I couldn't stop. I heard another friend Mary tell everyone I was having a nervous breakdown, just like she had told everyone in ninth grade when a similar event happened. The teacher banished me from the room and told me I was interrupting class, which I guess had convened sometime while I was crying. I wandered the halls in complete despair, not knowing where to go or what to do. I found myself in an upstairs room, reminiscent of a loft of some sorts. I sat there and continued to cry. By and by a tall man came over. I didn't really know who he was. But it seems he was, like I said, tall and he had dark hair and glasses. (If I were trying to interpret this dream I would say he represented my father because of the similarities) I took him for a school counselor. He started talking to me, asking me what was going on. I couldn't get the words out to describe what was going on, I just cried. So he held me. He wrapped his arms around me, and held me while I cried. The phone rang to wake me up. When I lay down again to go back to sleep I couldn't get it back.

8:48 p.m. - 05-26-2001
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