damik's Diaryland Diary

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Stuff

I had a pretty good day today. I went to my mom's to visit. I stayed there for quite some time. Longer then I intended. She showed me a box in her bedroom that had tons of papers and such in it. She thought that maybe some of my writing that I had done as a child were in there. I had some stuff, but not what I was looking for. I'm not sure I'm going to find the stuff. But, I'll keep looking. I got to see my nephew also. He's such a cutie. He doesn't know me that well though so trying to get him to spend time with me is an effort. Then my brother-in-law, lets call him Patrick, came to pick up his son. He got stuck there with me. It started storming real bad, the wind was knocking down tree's and the visibility was low. So we waited out the storm. Patrick and I started goofing off, play fighting. I'm not sure if it was just my imagination or what, but I sensed that there was still something, for lack of a better way to put it, "unfinished" between us. When he first moved out of state, and my sister was away, he admitted to being attracted to me. I don't know if he was just saying that because he was lonely or if it was true, but there seemed to be a little of that in the air again.

I like the idea of being wanted still. I think I'm too familiar to Trevor. And not to sound too much like the Billy Joel song, I don't know that he really sees me anymore. Or maybe he just takes me for granted. I wanted him to kiss me like we did when we just met, like we were still passionate about each other. But he wouldn't. How does he expect me to be kinky in bed when he won't be passionate when we aren't in bed.

Shh, don't tell anyone, actually I'm kind of embarrassed to even write this, but last night I had a dream about a guy I work with. In the dream we both got off work at the same time and we decided to hang out with each other, I don't remember much of the dream but one thing led to another, and we ended up... The odd thing is in my dream he had three, um, penises. I'm not sure what to do with that one. Actually I'm not sure what to do with the entire dream. But the guy I had the dream about is a real nice guy. He has me pegged. We have only worked together, I mean actually together, for about two months now. And he's already figured that I'm pure, unadulterated evil. That�s pretty good. Usually it takes people a few years to figure that one out.

12:26 a.m. - 06-13-2001
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