damik's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Temper, temper

Well I added two new poems to my other site, so if anyone out there actually reads them, you should check them out.
Once again I was that jealous girl I don't want to be.
I set the stage Friday afternoon, but the story actually starts the night before, when Trevor and I went out dancing. He had to go to work right after and by the next afternoon, he was beat. Now all he had to do way stay up for 45 more minutes and take me to work, and we wouldn't have had a problem at all, but he couldn't. So when the time for me to go to work rolled around, I tried to wake him up. But he was lost in the land of nod.
After several attempts he woke up enough to tell me to just take the car to work and he'd get one of his friends to take him to my work to pick it up. Sounded like a plan to me. And that's what we did.
But as the night wore on, he sill wasn't able to get a hold of his friend to get him there, and I went to bed with out him picking up the car. When I talked to him the next day he said that Trevor had gotten a hold of him around 1:30am and had gotten the car then.
I took him at his word and thought nothing more of it.
Discussion that Saturday centered a lot on money. He had pulled 40 out of the ATM at sometime the day before, or that day. Then money here, money there. Discrepancies. But it got to the point Saturday night I was questioning him where the money went. Because it just didn't add up. It was then he confessed that it wasn't the friend that he told me that took him to get the car. It was Jessica. And that then they went out to breakfast. He got home at about 4:00am.
I must admit, that I didn't take it very well. My stomach got sick. I saw red. I was very jealous, and mad. I had told him earlier this week if he valued our relationship at all, he wouldn't have any more to do with her. I told him that I didn't feel comfortable with him pursuing a friendship with her anymore. Besides which it could make things difficult for him in his work, because she now works in his department. As her direct manager, bad things could happen if the wrong person twists their past.
I felt these were all reasonable arguments. And he told me if I felt that way he wouldn't talk to her on the phone, hang out with her socially, that he would keep it strictly business. Then not a week later, he was having breakfast with her. I was thrown for a loop. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to take that. And I didn't take it well.
But I've put that behind me. I will no longer be jealous, I will no longer dwell on this. I told him that I will no longer be a bitch when he hangs out with her, as long as I know that that's what he intends on doing. I just want to be prepared. I don't want him to feel like he can't tell me about hanging with Jessica for fear of me flying off the handle.
I want to be fair to him.
Though he says he won't be doing anything social with her any more.

6:12 p.m. - 03-10-02
0 comments

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next