damik's Diaryland Diary

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The first of the lasts

As a group we (well most of us) talk about leaving. Packing up our world and getting the hell out of Utah.
Well the first of us is leaving. Tuesday. It seems rather sudden. Even though we've all been talking about it for years. It seems unreal, too. You don't get to leave Utah. Utah is the fly paper state. You don't want to be there, but what can you do you're stuck.
As I've said we are going to be gone June. That weary part of me still believes its just talk. But its wrong.
So this year is going to be a year of lasts. Sunday will be the last Christmas, my last Utah birthday will come the end of next month. And so much more.
I know I should stop it, if I continue down such thoughts I'll scare myself so much I won't be able to function. Moving to California has always been a goal. Pacifica was a reason to choose life, a becon of hope if I may get so dramatic.
I just didn't realize pulling up my roots would be so freaky.

12:29 a.m. - 12-24-05
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