damik's Diaryland Diary

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I broke it again

I broke the car. I can't even begin to say how fucken dumb I feel for doing it. It involved a gas station, one of thoes stupid cement pole thingies, and my compleate stupidity. Thats all I have to say about that, well and I'm glad that Trevor didn't kill me. He was very understanding, even though I pretty much financally raped us.
I got myself a therapist, I'll call him Dr. Mark, I figured after Halloween maybe I should take Andrew's advice and try something else. Obviously I'm not going to claw my way out by myself. We got historical. I guess that's what you do the first session. I have to admit, I wasn't as forthcomming as I usually am. I'm not sure why I have reservations in telling Dr. Mark stuff. That's what he's there for right. We talked about all sorts of things, school, work, past family abuse, Trevor. He said that Trevor is hunting. And by telling me of all the girls he's interested in he's numbing me to the inevitable. "Inoculating" is the word he used. He said that we should give it a 90 day period, and in that time give it all we've got... We made another apointment for next week, kinda makes me nervious, the insurance people only approved me for six sessions. We'll see.
Trevor and I talked about moving in with his parrents again for a while to save money. I was so willing to go along with it till I realized the cats. I'm not sure how that would work out. I don't want them to become outdoor cats. Especally because their cat Tigger died.

12:20 p.m. - 11-02-01
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