damik's Diaryland Diary
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sometimes I can't see through the moment
Yesterday Will and I got me a little ring to comemorate 90 days w/o self injury. A little silver ring with a deep red cz. I wanted to give it back today because I felt like a fraud. I wanted to cut because of how badly I hate myself. I don't fit into my size 12's any more. I don't even fit into the size 34's I gave to Will. I have let myself go badly. I hate how much I weigh now. I hate looking into the mirror and hating what I see. All the failed attempts I've had at weight loss is discouraging me. He got frusterated with me and my pessimisum. He talked about goal orented action. How I should never give up. He's right and I know it. I get myself so worked up and so discouraged I don't see it. I don't want to hear it.
5:57 p.m. - 04-10-04
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
older entries: When. I called when! - 11:27 p.m. , 10-07-13 Intrusive - 3:31 p.m. , 09-12-13 It isn't working today. - 2:21 p.m. , 09-09-13 Sleep, SI, Stress, and Pain, yeah, I hit them all. - 4:46 p.m. , 08-09-13 I hate this game. I don't want to play anymore. - 2:59 p.m. , 05-29-13 |
